BREAKING FREE

BREAKING FREE:

How a Horse Delivered Me From the Bondage of Self

By Tom Gumbrecht                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Originally published in Horse Directory,  June, 2014

There is a quotation penned on the whiteboard of our barn, or more accurately, a derivation of one written by someone named Lao Tzu that reads. “He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty.” I had read this before, but it took a long time for me to begin to understand it and I’m certain I still don’t, fully. When I began to understand it is when I put it up on the board, because of its importance to my training (and my life) and how my horses helped me to understand it.

The author with DannyBoy at Equus Valley Horse Trials

I first thought that conquering self was about only self-control, about discipline, about will power. For me, the idea developed further into being about the deconstruction of the image of self that I had created. That image existed in my mind and it was a handsome one, but not terribly accurate. It consisted mainly of who I thought I was, or who thought I could have been if not for the endless obstacles placed in my path by others. I worked on maintaining the image, and it could have possibly existed forever if I had never been exposed to a horse.

I was gifted not especially with talent, but with an almost insatiable appetite for learning when it came to my middle-aged introduction to horses.  I had two trainers at the same time (perhaps would not do that again), rode at literally every opportunity and bought and read every book from every horse trainer, rider, clinician, and horsey philosopher I could find. And still, excellence eluded me. What I became was confused.

In other areas of life, I had become a master of the concept of “fake it ‘til you make it.” In some pursuits, that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Acquire some concepts, some jargon and some contacts, let that open a few doors, gain some exposure and acceptance and pick up knowledge through osmosis.  Not so with horses, I was to find out. You can’t fake it with a horse (unless, of course, the horse is in on it) and thereby lay the source of my frequent frustration.  I can present the best façade imaginable, one that may work wonders with some humans and yet the horse would see right past them. The horse, I was to find, responds only to the true self, the true me.  My hope for anything modestly resembling success on horseback required that I first acknowledge, accept, and become familiar with my true self.

I had to turn my gaze inward. Much of what I had yet to learn did not exist in books and found that I didn’t

The author with DannyBoy, leaning to let
go and let the horse do his job.

need to study and master the intellectual concepts of my lessons.  Rather I needed feel them in my fingertips, my calves, my heel, my seat.  My legs would remember what my brain could not comprehend.  It was a new way to learn, and at times frightening.  I had sought to master the horse, and now the horse was my teacher.  My ego, which I assumed had bolstered the little bit of professional recognition I had managed to acquire, was no longer an attribute.  In fact it was a liability, because the horse did not acknowledge or respond to it. The horse knew the real me, and was waiting for me to honestly present it. Perhaps that was the frightening part..

A point came where I found myself struggling with lessons from a teacher who challenged me as no other had. This teacher was a mare who had known nothing but the racetrack and the paddock in my backyard; I began to think that I would never have the level of expertise needed to be successful riding her. But expertise was not what she wanted. She wanted honesty. As she became more fit, I became more overwhelmed and fearful, and rode defensively.  The toughest thing was to admit that, but admitting it was the key.  My trainer had created an environment where it was safe to be 100% honest, and I felt no need to hide my fear. Once I did, we restructured and went back to the point where we had been successful and built from there yet again. Soon we were past the point at which we were once stuck, because someone was able to help me interpret what my horse needed of me.

This I know:  the process of knowing myself has been an incredible adventure, made possible by the many horses I have had the privilege of working with. They have all been my teachers; yet as valuable as it has been to have learned to know myself, I have been especially fortunate to have experienced glimpses of the next dimension:  overcoming myself.

It would not be honest to claim consistency in this concept, but I have tasted it and my appetite to pursue it has been whetted: to enter an arena and for a moment in time, totally and completely give myself over to my horse, to leave my ego at the gate, to trust completely. I have experienced that level of synergy if for a moment, and it has shown me what it is possible to achieve by a magnificent animal’s uncanny ability to remove me from the self which at a point only selves to inhibit and not propel.

Lola- learning partnership from a beautiful soul..

What lofty goals will I achieve, having learned these concepts? Well… the concepts are still for me somewhat elusive but in a way I may have already achieved my goals. I have learned that there are bigger things than the self, and the biggest rewards in life as in riding, come when the self is in the background rather than the foreground.  This is not a remarkable concept for many; it was for me, and it took a horse to teach it in a way that I could accept it.

ESCAPE FROM WINTER

Escape from Winter                                                                 

Originally published in Horse Directory, May, 2014

By Tom Gumbrecht

It felt like something of a shock to the system: that first ride of the season after an unusually

The snow seemed endless and was our sole focus
for weeks on end

severe and repressively long winter, mercifully interrupted by a teasing, late spring.

It had been many months since I had climbed into the saddle, many months of non-stop mucking of stalls, chopping ice from feet, endless plowing and shoveling of snow, and thawing pipes that were electrically heated but froze anyway.  Chipping away at sheets of ice so that the cart could get the manure to the dumpster and the manure truck could take it away. Digging out gates, multiple blanket changes, pulling icicles from manes and huge electric bills to get water in front of the horses and keep it from freezing.

Now, I am one of those people who can honestly say that I have never minded walking down to the barn to take care of my horses, but I will admit that I came close this winter.  Not that I wanted to skip caring for them, but fighting a fever and chills, bracing each step against the wind while shielding my face from cutting shards of ice and blowing snow, feeling the thousand knives of crystallized breath inside my nostrils …. I did think, once or twice, “Can someone please come and do this for me, just tonight?”

Then the barn door opens and the air is filled with welcoming nickers and the comforting relative warmth of the hay-fueled, hooved, barn heating system.  The horses know that it’s cold, but they

A few moments recalling the racetrack on the longeline
make for a more productive first ride

place no value judgment on it.  It’s not horribly cold; it’s just cold.

The first few warmer days are a cruel tease; a little thawing of the arena footing followed by more snow and freezing temperatures.  But one afternoon the arena looks perfect, the sweatshirt comes off, the shirtsleeves get rolled up, and…. It is time.  I still second-guess myself after a winter’s hiatus from riding.  Can I still do it? Can my recently senior-citizen qualified body still take it?  I really only wonder about such things when I’m not actually on my horse; when idle periods let thoughts of “what if?” permeate my generally positive resolve.   

Fifteen minutes on a longeline dull Lola’s memories of the racetrack and I am awestruck once again at the poetry of a Thoroughbred horse in motion.  Then a boot finds an iron, a leg swings over a horse and everything finds its familiar place. Reins fall perfectly into place between gloved fingers.  Boots fall into irons at the right depth and angle, all by themselves.  I feel tall, physically and spiritually.  We walk the freshly groomed arena and get comfortable with all of the sensations again.  The rhythm of the rising trot takes hold, her ears go forward and the partnership has been renewed for another season.  I wasn’t going to canter but we both silently agreed to alter that plan. A slight leg pressure behind the girth and we take wing.  I love where I am, and I love who I am here with.  I love who I am when I am one with my horse. 

The  girls enjoy a long awaited spring day.

Spring is a time of renewal and I am again renewed.  More accurately, perhaps, I am born anew.  Why is this so?  Perhaps, as expressed in the words of horsewoman/ writer Pam Brown,

“A horse is the projection of peoples’ dreams about themselves – strong, powerful, beautiful – and has the capability of lending escape from our mundane existence.”

This winter, we existed.  This spring, we soar…

BACK ON TRACK

BACK ON TRACK                         
Originally published in Horse Directory                                                      April, 2014

By Tom Gumbrecht

Lola allowed the author to hitch his
cart to her star..

The tedium of the blue funk that befell us and called itself the winter of 2014 was interrupted for a day last month when a crew of young filmmakers from Savannah took over our barn for a few hours, turning the frozen tundra of paddocks into a backdrop for a small segment of an independent film about ex-racehorses. They had come to see my Lola, and learn about her story.

After several hours of shooting in sub-freezing temperatures, we adjourned to a local restaurant with the crew to thaw out and share a meal and some insight into the background of director Kara Colvin, her hopes for the film, and the challenges she has faced in creating the feature length documentary called Back On Track that has become her mission.

Tom Gumbrecht: Where do you live now, and have you always lived there?

Kara Colvin: I currently live in Savannah, GA but I grew up in Tallahassee, FL.

TG: How long have you been interested in horses? When did you get your first horse?

KC: For as long as I can remember, I have always loved horses. They are the most incredible animals to me. I always watched Black Beauty and The Black Stallion, I drew horses at every chance I could get and, of course, my room was filled to the capacity with Breyer horses and stuffed animal horses. I was just one of those little girls who was struck with the horse-addict bug and it has been a part of me ever since.

On my 13^th birthday my parents bought me my first and only horse: Jake, an off the track thoroughbred.

TG: How did you get interested in OTTBs? Can you tell me something special about your OTTB?

KC: My first real trainer always had OTTBs at her barn. That’s how I met Jake. I began riding on all sorts...of horses when I first started off. You know, those ancient fat quarter horses that will maybe take two steps if you use every inch of your being to make them move. I really didn’t mind, it made my education as a rider very diverse. I rode all sorts of horses: Tennessee walkers, Arabians, warmbloods, a dinky fat pony named Ashes, but I truly loved the thoroughbreds. I loved the power and grace they had, also their never-ending courage and will to please.

Jake is the smartest horse I have ever met. In all my years and experience with a variety of breeds, I have never met a horse as intelligent as him. Because of this, he has always been a challenge and the perfect horse to learn and grow with. He also loves salty snacks!

Director Kara Colvin, Dir. of Photography Colt Morton,
the author and Lola.
Photo by assistant Jasmine Hughes.

TG: Where do you go to school, and how did you choose film making as a potential career?

KC: I go to Savannah College of Art and Design. I graduated in 2013 with a 4.0 GPA and a BFA in Film & Television with a minor in Cinema Studies. I am now completing my Cinema Studies masters in a fast-paced yearlong program at SCAD and plan to graduate in summer 2014…

…Film was not my immediate interest at SCAD. I started off in painting, then illustration, interior design, and then production design for a moment and then to film. I’m very happy with my end decision and I wouldn’t trade what I’m doing now for anything in the world. Cinema had always been a portion of my life; I just had not accepted that it was the perfect outlet for my creative and ambitious aspirations.

TG: How did you decide to do a documentary about OTTBs? One you decided, what was your first step?

KC: Well, SCAD is not focused on documentaries. They are definitely a narrative-based school. There is one required documentary class. I was always interested in directing but I think that since the school was filled with “prodigies” in directing, I was certainly intimidated to make an effort towards my aspirations. I was very shy when I arrived at SCAD and stuck with production design.

I wanted to do something about retired racehorses but I wasn’t sure what I could accomplish…. Back on Track was born and the class fully supported my idea. I created the short over the span of a year and a half….  then started thinking about making Back on Track into a feature after the short was accepted and won the Silver Award at National Geographic’s Grey’s Reef Film Festival.

When creating the short the first step was contacting everyone I knew from my past that I rode with/knew about OTTBs, research and creating a story/script….. ..I also took on a new level of confidence, courage and determination that I needed to accomplish growing as a director. The first steps were not easy, but necessary for the position I am at now.

TG: What has been your biggest challenge in shooting Back On Track? What was your biggest disappointment? What about the process has been most rewarding?

KC: ….. There is not a part of Back on Track that is not challenging or a learning experience.

DannyBoy, not to be upstaged, tries to charm director
Kara Colvin

This is a large feature-length film that incorporates countless organizations/professionals from FL, VA, PA, MD, DC, CA, NY, SC, NC, KY and OH. It is difficult, and not many people realize how much time, money, effort and determination it takes to create this project. I have to thank my crew endlessly for their dedication and energy they put forth towards the project. They are not being paid; it is exhausting to be on a set for 12 plus hour days with minimal breaks and intense labor. They do it because they love the film and the message we are sending out. I could not do this without them.

Biggest disappointment: Well, there have been a lot. Like with any set, things don’t always go to plan –documentaries in particular. You can’t always plan for what will happen. One of my biggest disappointments was when we were not able to make a trip to see a 2-day show that we were looking forward to. Issues came up and I could not plan a trip around some of the complications. We were disappointed but the biggest setback was the negativity and insults we received from that group for not making the journey.

The most rewarding part: Is having the opportunity to create this film! I have never seen so much passion and love before. Everyone that I have met has such devotion towards thoroughbreds. The people who dedicate their lives to OTTBs deserve a chance to be recognized. It has been truly amazing and a humbling experience.

I also was fortunate enough to have the chance to create Albie. Albie is one of the stories from our trips. It revolves around a woman, Lori, who has had multiple brain surgeries and an off the track thoroughbred, Albie. Together they have helped heal each other’s emotional, mental and physical ailments and create an unbreakable bond.

TG: What is something that would surprise the average person about what goes into making a documentary? What is the most important quality for the director of a documentary to possess?

KC: It is a lot of work, stressful, very expensive and life-consuming but completely worth it. Documentary filmmaking is art, entertainment and information all in the form of a picture. There is a lot of responsibility that comes with being a documentary filmmaker. It is your choice to create an accurate story and/or depiction of your subject matter.

As a young director, I still have an endless education and learning experiences ahead of me that will probably sculpt this answer better than what I am about to say now. I believe the most important quality for a director of a documentary to possess is passion. You cannot create a work of love without a true passion for the subject matter as well as filmmaking as a whole.

Lori White on Albie, with Suzanne Liscouski
on location at Briar Creek Farm in Virginia.

TG: What is the ultimate result that you would like to see accomplished as result of making this film?

KC: Our goal is to promote aftercare for off the track thoroughbreds once their racing careers are over, promote responsible horse ownership and breeding, secure a unified racing government that has universal regulations for all racing states, support regulations on drugs in racing, showcase off the track thoroughbreds as versatile horses for any and all disciplines after their track days are over and support the organizations who care for off the track thoroughbreds and give them second careers and/or homes.

Thoroughbreds are wonderful, athletic, intelligent, caring, brave, powerful and beautiful creatures. I am dedicating my life to this film in the hopes of creating a difference for them. I owe Jake everything, for his love and support as my best friend and riding partner for half my life. This film was started because of him and every time I get discouraged, I think about him and how much he means to me. All off the track thoroughbreds deserve a second chance and a second life beyond the track. There are so many organizations and professionals who deserve to be recognized for their dedication to the sport and to thoroughbred aftercare.

I support thoroughbreds on and off the track and I hope this film makes a difference in the future of the sport of kings. It is time to get thoroughbred racing and off the track thoroughbreds back on track.

Our day on and off the set of Back On Track left us totally impressed with the

Lola. Original drawing by Casey Brister.

competence, integrity, focus and passion of the young filmmakers who had graced our backyard farm gates. As we parted company, we were left with a feeling of warmth and confidence that the future of Off-Track Thoroughbreds has been gifted with some very talented and concerned advocates.

It is said that people are opinions and horses are the truth. Back On Track, ultimately, is about the horses.

Learn more about Back On Track:
backontrackdocumentary.com

THE SCIENCE OF BONDING: Heart to Heart With a Horse

THE SCIENCE OF BONDING: HEART TO HEART WITH A HORSE   

             

Originally published in Horse Directory,                                March 2014

By Tom Gumbrecht

We as horsepeople are drawn to horses; that seems obvious enough.  When relating our stories about a particular episode that illustrates the horse-human connection, other horsepeople nod in agreement and sometimes finish our sentences, while those who have not been so afflicted might feign interest while stealing glances at their smartphones.  That’s just how it is. Those that understand already know; those that do not, conventional wisdom dictated, likely never will.

Lola makes the author smile:
Science, emotion..or both?

Tales of the horse-human bond, and the feelings of well-being we get from being in the company of horses, are the stuff of novels, poems, plays, movies and countless hours of stories in the barn aisles and tackrooms throughout the world.  They are just that: stories, anecdotal evidence.  We all know this, and most of us appreciate it.  Even if not convinced, non- horsepeople often think our views to be harmless at worst, a little quaint perhaps and maybe even a little charming.  They are our experiences, we enjoy relating them, and they can’t be proven or disproven.  Or can they?

We recently became aware of the work being done at the Institute of HeartMath (IHM) in Colorado which studies the heart as more than just a pump to keep our blood flowing.  Scientists there believe the heart to be the center of not only physical, but emotional and spiritual well- being also, and have undertaken extensive research to support their theories.  It seems that electromagnetic fields surrounding our hearts have the ability to affect other species as well.  Dr. Rollin McCraty, Research Director at the Institute of HeartMath put it this way:

“It appears that there is a type of communication occurring between people above and beyond body language and verbal communication.  I believe we’ll see in future research studies that we are affecting each others’ moods and attitudes, both positively and negatively, by the electromagnetic fields we radiate.  In our work with pets and their owners, we’ve seen that a pet owner can create what we call a heart filled environment when practicing heart- focused techniques.  The pets respond by becoming more affectionate, more animated, and more connected with the pet owner.”

After becoming aware of the work of the IHM in studying heart rate variability as an indicator of feelings of well- being in humans and small animals, Dr. Ellen Kaye Gehrke, who is involved with Equine Assisted Activities and Therapy at her Rolling Horse Ranch in California, began exploring the phenomenon with horses.  In experiments conducted by Dr. Gehrke, following a protocol designed by IHM, studies showed that during exercises that promoted emotional bonding between human and horse, the beat- to- beat fluctuations in the human and horse hearts began to

The author with Circus..
the horse that started it all..

synchronize, and ultimately matched one another. Heart Rate Variability (HRV) reflects heart- brain interactions and is sensitive to changes in emotional states.  It is possible to accurately measure HRV rhythms in both humans and horses and relate those values to those known to reflect a positive emotional state (called a “coherent pattern” by the researchers). That coherent pattern and the positive emotional state it represents, are present when the heart rhythms are synchronized.  Interestingly, that synchronization does not occur with a human subject who is indifferent toward the horse, but quite noticeably appears when subject has interest in the horse. The feeling of well being in certain humans when in proximity of horses is thus recordable and measurable.

For many, these experiments, the content of which I have only just brushed the surface of in these pages, are telling us what we already know.  I have experienced the phenomenon of a changed emotional state by simply being in the proximity of horses in many instances.  Some years ago, we made the decision to purchase horse property.  The house we were selling was comfortable for us physically and financially and we had invested a lot of time and money into making it our own. Sometime during the agonizing summer of buying, selling and moving into a much larger property than I ever expected to live in, fear crept in.. followed by guilt. What was I doing? How could I jeopardize my family’s well being to follow a crazy dream? The frenzied activity of that season left little time for horses and riding.  But one day the stress got so intense that I just shut down and drove to a local riding stable.  I took a horse that I was acquainted with and headed out on trail for a few hours. In five minutes it all became clear; once I was in the physical presence of a horse, it all made sense once again.  Everything will be all right. In fact, everything IS all right!

As a man of words more than a man of science,  I was amused but not totally convinced of the value of technology finding a way to validate our experiences which showed that being in the aura of a horse produced feelings of a positive emotional state and general well- being.  But then I began to see the importance of having what we knew to be true anecdotally, to now be quantifiable, repeatable and recordable by using scientific methods:

Horses help many who have not been able to be helped by more conventional means.  We have all seen or heard stories, or perhaps witnessed or even personally experienced major emotional breakthroughs facilitated by horses.  We marvel at the ability of our equines to provide a safe venue in which to process our most fragile feelings.  Does it matter that researchers have now

The author shares a quiet moment with Lola...

identified that the large magnetic fields surrounding the massive equine heart might be responsible for creating that environment?

It may.  We live in a world where much of the cost of therapeutic treatment is paid for by health care insurance.  Alternative therapies have a much better chance of being funded if there is clinical rather than anecdotal evidence that they work. The current research may open the door for increased funding for programs that produce results for those who need it most… or at least provide these programs with legitimacy to those who may raise a skeptical eyebrow to unconventional therapies.

As one who works with words, I have in the past penned the phrase “the heart of the horse and the heart of the rider beat as one” or something similar, more than once.  It’s fascinating to think that now science supports my beliefs!

To learn more about the science of HeartMath as it relates to horses, follow this link:

isar.dk/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Dr_Kaye_Article.pdf

Archived articles are available at tcgequine.blogspot.com.  Email the author at tcgequine@gmail.com

Visit us on Facebook: Tom Gumbrecht. Visit my very self-absorbed paint horse on Facebook at The World According To DannyBoy.

LOVE CONQUERS HATE: Confessions of a Former Horse Racing Hater

LOVE CONQUERS HATE:

CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER HORSE RACING HATER   

by Tom Gumbrecht                                                   

Originally published in Horse Directory, February 2014

Most people who know me, either personally or through my written words might be surprised to hear me referred to as a “hater.” But it’s true. I was a horse-racing hater.

How that came to be was that like most hate, mine developed through a combination of outrage, passion and ignorance.  I might still be in that state if not for a young racetrack groom who I became acquainted with through a series of seemingly random events.

My disenchantment with horse racing began after I purchased my first Off-Track Thoroughbred mare, Lola, from the New Holland auction. I excitedly returned to our Long Island horse farm with great expectations which were crushed the next day when the drugs that masked the symptoms of her injury wore off.

Lola in her racing days

It took almost two years, a lot of work on my part and a lot of patience on Lola’s part, but she did ultimately become sound. During that time, Lola revealed herself to be the sweetest, most honest, thoughtful and grateful horse to ever grace our barn aisle. I love all of our horses, but the bond that developed between Lola and I was special. Although in almost constant discomfort in the early days, she would nicker furiously whenever I stepped into her view, be it hours or seconds from the last time she saw me.  She had issues. She was damaged. She was not a perfect horse, but she had the perfect attitude with which to get well, and to motivate me to get her well. She showed me that a good attitude was much more important than good fortune.

The love that developed morphed into protectiveness when I finally found out her racing identity and documentation of her brief but promising career. My heart sank when I watched the video of Lola’s final race after posting numerous wins and places in just a dozen or so starts. She was pulled up, and limped off the track. My heart sank even further when I realized that it was but two weeks later that she found heself at the New Holland auction and later that evening, at my barn.

The author with Lola in a new life.. for both!

My shock and sadness turned to outrage. How could anyone with a heart beating in their chest discard this willing athlete without so much as an effort to help her? My anger began to seethe and the embers were fanned into flames the next spring when the Fox Hill mare, Eight Belles, was euthanized on the track at Churchill Downs after finishing second to Big Brown in the 2008 Kentucky Derby.  I became a hater that day. I didn’t know how to process my grief and so allowed it to become anger that sought out the bizarre and misguided comfort that comes from hate.

You see, hate allows us to think we are doing something about an issue when we are actually doing nothing. It is social activism for wimps. But hate is not a normal state for me. It was a manifestation of my untreated grief, anger, and outrage stemming from my love of an animal. And to love it had to return. I needed an opportunity to rid myself of this destructive emotion, and life provided one.

Teddy takes a nap with Casey at Monmouth Park

At a point it came to pass that a former stakes winner was saved from a feedlot by an alert racetrack worker, and he landed in the safety of a local horse rescue and sanctuary whose work I had been supporting. Soon after, word spread that a NY racing syndicate who had at one time owned the horse stepped up and made a contribution to his ongoing care at the sanctuary. That horse’s life softened that day, and so did my heart... at least a little bit. I was impressed by the gesture and contacted one of the partners who was fluent in social media, and told him so. An online friendship developed which led to me being linked to many of his racetrack connections, one of whom was a young track groom named Casey Brister.

Casey was, and is, a unique personality.  A comforting beacon of positivity, enthusiasm and wit in any venue, let alone the racing world that I had heretofore viewed with suspicion. Not even twenty years old, she possessed what we older folks most endearingly refer to as an “old soul” referring to poise and wisdom beyond her years. Casey’s life is about horses. In racing season, it means skillfully and thoughtfully seeing to the needs of the horses in her charge, and filling their world with the love of a horse-crazed girl that every horse deserves.

Casey Brister with Teddy at Monmouth Park
Photo by Corinne Cavallo @fotocavllo

I began reading Casey’s ‘day in the life on the backstretch’ blog posts, and so was introduced into her world, the world of horse racing. It turned out that it was a world, perhaps busier, but with the same reverence, compassion and love for these majestic animals as we experience at our own home barn.  She was generous in the sharing of her experiences and so I became educated. Education is the enemy of hate, and this unassuming ambassador for goodness in the racing world, not one-third my age, unknowingly became my teacher. I began to see things through different eyes, the eyes of knowledge rather than the eyes of ignorance.

But racing is seasonal, and when the tack trunks are packed up at the end of the season, Casey unpacks her art supplies and embarks on her other career.  A self- taught artist, she has the innate ability to recreate not only the image of her equine subjects on paper, but captures their soul as well, and gives it back one skillful pencil- or brush stroke at a time. Many are skilled at the mechanics of drawing, and their techniques are appreciated and respected. Once in a while there exists something special, some secret ingredient that asks you to gaze deeply into the liquid eyes of the image and to almost feel their horsey breath on your cheek as you do. That ingredient is love.

This Christmas season, I had the honor of having Casey recreate Lola’s soul for me on paper. I treasure it, not only for its aesthetic beauty, not only for what it is, but for what it represents: the triumph of love over hate.

Casey finds the soul of Lola and puts it on paper..

Truth be told, I still have some issues with racing, but they are not much different from my concerns with the competitive disciplines that I was part of in the horse world: treatment and care during the competitive years, and pensions for ongoing care when their competitive careers are over. I can live much easier with my concerns knowing that there are people like Casey Brister at racetracks all over America.

Visit Casey Brister on facebook: Living In Realism - Artwork by Casey

Visit Corinne Cavallo on facebook: FotoCavallo

A MATTER OF TRUST

A MATTER OF TRUST

Originally published in Horse Directory,                                                               December 2013

By Tom Gumbrecht

I guess we all believe that we know about trust. I know I did. But until I began my journey with horses, I didn't realize how much I had to learn. I was of course familiar with the Webster definition:

Trust

n. Reliance on the truth, character, ability or strength of someone or something.

v. To place confidence in.

 

Early lessons in trust taught by Laura Ruben,
trainer, and OTTB Lola

From the beginning of my equestrian pursuits, I was forever being told to "trust my horse." Looking back, I had but little trust and it showed, mainly in my hands. I had what many a trainer called "the death grip." I didn't think I had the death grip. I thought I had a firm grip, and that a firm grip was warranted. It was the same grip I had used years ago in sailing my boat in a squall, and landing an airplane in a crosswind. A firm grip. A very, very firm grip.

But horses are not objects or machines to be controlled, they are parters with whom we collaborate. The casual observer could not have known that for me, the mere act of getting on a horse required a tremendous amount of faith. I loved horses and wanted more than anything to learn not only to ride them but to someday jump in competition. Fear held me back. I was scared of getting physically hurt, but I was perhaps more scared of falling short, of not being able to cut it as a middle aged beginner. I had enough faith in the person who put me on my first horse to allay some of my fears. From that faith developed trust. I chose to have faith in the person who said that I was going to be all right, and began to trust once I actually was, relatively, all right.

For much of my life, I thought that trust was one of those "nice-to-have" things that developed or didn't develop over time. Nice when it comes, but also okay if it doesn't. The extent to which trust developed or didn't develop merely changed the dynamics of the relationship. In taking up riding, I was to learn a different way to think..

In the pursuit of competence in riding, I found, for myself, that trust is a requirement in order to get past a level of mediocrity. My mind had been toying with that concept for a while, when a well-accomplished rider told me during a chance meeting in a discussion about training that one of the biggest problems he observed was students riding with trainers who they did not trust. "If you can't trust your trainer 100%, find a new one" was how he put it.  He sort of rocked my world.

In riding, I had always thought of trust in terms of trusting my horse. But his point made perfect sense. In attempting to make progress in riding, we are constantly asked to leave our comfort zone. If there is not full trust in the person doing the asking, I will question the request, perhaps doubting the person's knowledge, intent, caring or motivation. Once that happens, even a little bit, the process shifts from "listen-execute" to "listen-evaluate-analyze-judge-agonize-possibly execute." Not the pathway to success for a rider. It's much too complicated, while mounted and attempting to execute a challenging maneuver, to be second guessing the person who is teaching me. Once I do, the opportunity to be effective has passed, the horse is confused, I am disheartened and the trainer is frustrated.

Experiences like that sometimes caused me to question my ability to even learn. Perhaps I was too old, too uncoordinated, too egocentric. I thought that maybe things that I struggled with were incredibly complex and it was just beyond my ability to comprehend. Actually all that was missing was that I had not learned to trust. Once that changed, everything changed. Two words changed everything for me, once I trusted enough to believe them: "You're fine!" She feels like she wants to buck. "You're fine. You can ride out a buck." She's really building up speed. "You're fine. You know how to handle it." What if she stops at a fence again? "You're fine. You have a good seat." What if she drops a shoulder at the canter? "You're fine. You ride with your shoulders back and your heels down so nothing will happen" What was THAT? Multiple bucks, a spin, and the drop of a shoulder!! "Congratulations. You have just seen the absolute worst this horse has to offer, I promise you. And you survived. From now on, anything this horse does will at best please you or at worst amuse you because there is nothing she can do that you can't handle."

Powerful words, that I learned to actually believe. In a safe and supportive learning environment, I learned to trust my trainer 100% of the time, and my horse 90% of the time. We are working on the remaining 10%, but we are worlds away from where we once were, when I trusted only my own judgment and believed that everything required my utmost scrutiny.

The payoff comes in the form of a huge grin whenever I ride my off-the racetrack Thoroughbred mare Lola over a short course of fences in nothing but a halter and slack lead rope. She needed me to trust her enough to let her be the magnificent horse that she is. She couldn't do that with me wanting to be in control of her every freedom of movement. Who could?

In the past, I had feared a struggle, and my attempt to control something that had not yet happened actually created that which I had feared. It makes me wonder how many other things in life I had created or at least facilitated by my perceived need to control and my inability to trust.

Magnificence, it turns out, does not flourish in a stranglehold. On a horse or anywhere. This is a lesson that I could learn only from a horse. Silently uttered by every horse everywhere, and available for reference whenever we are ready, is much wisdom:

"To enter my world you must trust me with your heart.

To trust me so deeply you must first trust yourself.

For where we travel with our spirits entwined,

Will be on a path of trust.." - Anonymous

Archived stories are available at tcgequine.blogspot.com Email us at tcgequine@gmail.com, Tweet us @tcgelec, or friend us on Facebook.com/TomGumbrecht. Our gregarious Paint gelding, DannyBoy, is on Facebook also: facebook.com/TheWorldAccordingToDannyBoy

THERAPISTS ON FOUR HOOVES

THERAPISTS ON FOUR HOOVES

Originally published in Horse Directory, November, 2013

by Tom Gumbrecht


The other day I read with interest, followed by deep sadness, about a young girl in Canada named Lacey Jamieson who was an accomplished equestrian. To watch her riding or just interacting with her horses was to understand what the horse-human bond was all about. She had, more than I had before witnessed, attained the oneness between horse and rider that is the stuff of horsey dreams.

Lacey Jamieson (RIP) Her confidence radiated;
she continues to inspire...

That was not, however, Lacey's claim to fame. Lacey Jamieson was also gifted with the ability to take her love of horses and riding and put it into words so as to spread it as joy via her daily postings to tens of thousands of devoted followers on the social media site Instagram. Though still in high school, she offered sage advice and support to other students as well as young adults who found themselves facing some of life's toughest challenges. One of her frequent topics was bullying.

Having experienced bullying herself, she well knew the fear, low self-worth and depression that can accompany its victims on their daily journey. Lacey fought that off by throwing herself into her interactions with her horses. Last weekend, Lacey passed away suddenly as the result of a rare and undiagnosed blood disorder. It hurt my heart even though I never knew her, and I wanted to find out more about her.

In doing so, I uncovered a flood tide of love, respect and gratitude being shared in the moment, by some of her 60,000+ Instagram fans. And it made me think about how our horses are so perfectly adapted to assisting in the treatment of victims of things like bullying.

Diana O'Donnell of PonyStrides

No stranger to the value of the horse as therapist, my thoughts went to Pony Strides, the amazing and tireless effort of longtime friend Diana O'Donnell and the H.E.A.L.S. program (Hope with Equine Alternative Life Solutions) which I have not only observed but benefitted from personally.

Diana has championed the concept of using equines (in this case two miniature horses named QJ and Cooper) in a unique anti-bullying program which she offers in collaboration with Long Island school districts.  The minis facilitate activities and exercises stressing communication, team building, leadership and other qualities.

Inexplicably sometimes, the equines' mere presence can create a safe environment to talk about things that students would not normally talk about in groups of their peers, things like feelings, needing and offering support, and giving and receiving positive feedback in the roles they execute in the team exercises.

One such breakthrough witnessed at a recent session of intermediate school students saw two groups who would not ordinarily mix collaborate on an exercise with one of the miniature horses. The minis demanded that the participants communicate effectively with one another in order to successfully execute it. One student's reaction to the change precipitated by working closely toward a common goal with someone outside of their clique:

"We may not start hanging out together, but when we pass each other in the hall, we will know

QJ, Frankie, Cooper & Jamie

that we have each others' backs."

Indeed. A statement eloquent in its simplicity, which illustrates perfectly the effectiveness of the program.

For those of us no longer of school age, we know that everyone's life can be affected by bullying to one degree or another. It might be from a boss, a client, a government agency or anyone that holds some small authority over any little area of our lives. Everyone is susceptible. Speaking from my own experience, here are a few of the ways in which I have observed how horses can help both the bully and the bullied:

1) People who have been hurt tend to hurt other people. Horses tend to take away the hurt, just by being who they are: understanding, non-judgmental, loyal, and loving.

2) A characteristic of bullies can be false bravado. Horses respond to the true nature of a person, not who a person pretends to be. To be loved by a horse requires only for you to be who you are. They reward authenticity.

3) Horses are big! Nothing like having a big friend when dealing with a bully! Seriously, since they are so much bigger and stronger than we are, successful interaction with horses requires effective communication as opposed to threats and aggression. A new set of skills must be learned.

4) Horses respect deeply those who show respect to them. Being respected can be life-changing.  For some, both the bully and the bullied, it may be the first time respect has been experienced in a long while.

5) When handled with confidence, horses can be supremely confident. When we learn the skills to interact confidently with a horse, we become a member of a formidable team that exudes confidence. We do not leave that confidence at the stable, we bring it with us. And when we do, we are less attractive as a target for bullies.

Having a best friend that's huge is helpful!

Having that one special friend can make all the difference in matters of self-esteem, and self-esteem can make all the difference in the opportunities that life offers us. For myself, I love having horses as friends. It has changed the course of my life and brought only a positive influence to all of my human interactions. Robert Duncan said it best, in his "Ode to the Horse:"

"Where in this world can you find
Friendship without envy
Beauty without vanity
Nobility without conceit
A willing partner yet no slave..."

I find it every day one hundred steps from my back door in a stable I have the privilege of sharing with some of my very best friends.

Archived stories are available on www.tcgequine.blogspot.com. Visit us on Facebook: Tom Gumbrecht
To find out more about Diana O'Donnell and her innovative programs at Pony Strides, visit www.ponystrides.com

Crystelle Salimbene with Bella. She is gifted with
with an ability to communicate effectively
with horses..

THE MAKING OF A MAN

THE MAKING OF A MAN

Originally published in Horse Directory,                                                OCTOBER 2013

By Tom Gumbrecht

It's not unusual to read about how life with horses can help to develop many positive character traits in young people. I can bear witness to that concept, having read and even written about some amazing transformations observed from the vantage point of the horse barn. But this really isn't about young people. 

From the time that I was a child I, like most young boys, became aware of that largely

"Courage is being scared to death, and saddling up anyway"
John Wayne

undefinable but very real quality known as "being a man," and set out on a convoluted journey to achieve it. It began with smoking, drinking with the guys, and building fast cars. It progressed to things like working in construction, flying airplanes, learning to jump out of them, extreme off-roading; always finding new ways to indulge in risk taking to a degree that I hoped would earn me that elusive title. But as much I pursued it, it always seemed to stay just out of reach.

I met the first horse I would eventually ride, Circus, while on an electrical construction project at a Long Island show barn. I became quite attracted to the horse, the riding, and horse people. It didn't fit the mold of what I decided was "manly" but two things happened: 1) I was developing a passion for horses and horsemanship to a degree that it would not be derailed by preconceived notions and 2) I had gotten a little older (ok, a lot older) and didn't care as much how people perceived me.

It was as if I had given up on my pursuit of the ultimate manly activity in order to follow the path on which my heart was taking me. In doing so, I discovered completely new definitions of what it was to be a man, as taught to me in what would ultimately become my own barn and by my own small herd of horses.

I learned the difference between controlling and cooperating. Airplanes are to be controlled,

The author's OTTB mare, Lola. Partners, not master and servant.

and that's what my life was about at the time I was actively flying them. Horses are about cooperation, I was to learn, sometimes painfully. Imposing my own will only works for a little while, with horses.

I learned how it is to truly put the needs of another being above my own. I had payed lip service to the concept in the past, but never owned it. I learned powerlessness and what it feels like to just do the best I can, without any knowledge of what the ultimate result will be. I learned how to let go when letting go was the right thing to do.

I learned that "my way or the highway" does not fly with horses, and in learning that, I learned that it does not work very well with the humans in my life either. I learned, to a large extent, to ignore transgressions and not take them personally, and to be generous in rewarding when compliance is attempted. 

I had sought out experiences to make me appear aggressive and brave, as I thought those were the makings of a man. The horse does not care how you appear, for he knows what lurks in your soul and responds to only that. In horsemanship, we become honest or fail. I

DannyBoy taught me the ways of the horse.

was taught all about honesty by these beings that live in a world that knows no other way, and found that total honesty in dealing with others requires more courage than aggression or threats.

I wanted to excel in my horsemanship, and in doing so I was forced to live in their world, the world of the here and now. Moving forward required letting go of the past and not obsessing about the future, and I eventually had to learn a new way if I were to achieve that elusive oneness with my horse.

I learned to be playful and silly with these giant playmates who required no mind altering substances to facilitate it, and I learned to take time for the things I loved. I discovered that if you are lucky enough to uncover and pursue a passion in life, then you are lucky enough. 

Most of all, I rediscovered my belief that there is a power greater than myself, and horses are all the evidence I need that he wants me to be happy. To aid me in my struggle, he used horses to help me to become the man he wanted me to be.

Archived stories are available at tcgequine.blogspot.com.  Visit us on Facebook: Tom Gumbrecht and Twitter: @tcgelec  Email us at tcgequine@gmail.com.